To say that the last month of my life has been intense and crazy would be an understatement. It's hard to believe that it has been a month since my last post. You could either conclude that I am doing nothing interesting worth writing or my life has been exteremely full and busy... you make the decision! So like usual, I have been running around without taking time to sit down and process anything which is a big problem in my life that I am working on. It's crucial to take a moments rest to look at the path we just ran. If we don't, we just run out of steam and sit on the side of the road dying. We aren't made for death though, but life. God has made us for life, and I want to live life to the fullest. That's why I am trying to step back to reflect on the things that have just happened in my life in order that I might have life.
This morning as I went into Avalon, a man was sitting at the table where I put down my stuff in order to get my Fairtrrade organic coffee and organic vegan granola bar (I love this place). He was a native to Detroit, and we ended up talking about various aspects of the city. It was great to hear his perspectives on things as well as awesome hole-in-the-wall places to visit. We talked about how great urban places like Avalon is because people will take time to talk to one another unlike the suburbs where everything is commercialized and everyone is in such a big rush. Maybe that's why I love Detroit so much because it has the relational aspect that I find in Africa as well. Not a lot gets accomplished, but we enjoy the time we spend with one another! But things are getting accomplished here in Detroit, but you will have to wait for another day to hear about that.
During my GAP traning at the beginning of September, we talked about how it would take 3-6 months to fully make the transition and settle into all the aspects of our GAP year, our service, our relationships, where we fit in, ect. The unfortunate thing is that as soon as you start to really feel that you know what you are doing, the year is up and it's time to go home. It's the bitter sweet nature of the program. It was really great to be in Detroit this summer because I was able to take in the shock of the city and begin to grasp the reality of what is going on in here in Detroit.
When I moved back at the end of August, most of my adjustments were related to living with a family, building friendships, and the youth work I am doing. I felt that I was learning so much all the time. Going from a college life living with a whole bunch of women my age to full time ministry living with a family with 3 (then 4) small children has been quite a transition. I had to learn all the house rules, and there were a lot of them because we live in an old house with small children. These house rules have become instictive to me now, but a couple of months ago they were overwhelming. I had to learn how to clean with vinegar, how to start the dishwasher, where to place the knifes so the children wouldn't get them, to keep my cup a safe distance from the edge of the counter so it wouldn't be spilt by the 21 month old, to keep the bathroom lights on, to close the inner door, where the kids hiding places are, how to change cloth diapers, how to clear the table and do dishes while holding an infant, the sponge system, and the list could do on. I think I am starting to get all the household rules, but often I am reminded or learn of a new one. Yesterday day I broke a pan because I didn't know that it couldn't be used on the stove. My mom had been cooking ground beef in those white pans my whole life then when I try to do it- the pan cracks. It would be my luck to have that happen. Now that winter is coming, there are all the energy saving practices. Luckily, I live in a house with an infant, so the heat has been turned on even though it is kept in the low 60's. The heat in the office won't be turned on until December, so I have been practicing layering a lot recently. When I move to a new place, I talk a lot about survival skills. There are certain things that you learn to do to survive in the place that you are at, but eventually it just becomes instintive and you don't have to think about it anymore. Putting a club on my car is one of those things that I just do instinctively now because it's part of the way of life here.
Family is a big part of the way of life here. Within our small Detroit Community Outreach (DCO) that I am a part of, we relate as one big family rather than seperate family units that are friends. Within in DCO, there are two families (the Rocks and Propsons), 3 men living in the Servants of the Word ecumenical brotherhood, 4 young guys living with the Servants, and one woman living single for the Lord. There are also others who are part of DCO, but the group I just named makes up the core. Because there is such a small group of us, we are really close and we really rely on one another. It was so great to have the brothers cook up meals three different times after the baby was born. Priscilla (the woman that I live with) broke her ankle last week, and three of the "young guys" came over and carried her out to the car so that we could go to the ER (being at Receiving's ER is another story for later). I am often calling the brothers to figure out carpooling to different events or going over to the Rock's house for dinner. The Lord has called the families within DCO to live a radical Christian life here in Detroit as a community and a family. We really love one another, and it is such a blessing to be apart of the Detroit family.
Now things haven't always been easy. It's often hard relating to the brothers, families, and children. I miss women my age to be able to hang out with and share life. It has been a great blessing to go to the University Christian Outreach events and prayer meeting at the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor to build sisterhood and other relationships. At the same time, God has been providing. Many people say that Detroit can often be a lonely place to do ministry but I haven't really experienced much loneliness. My roommate, Ana, who has been the other female gapper is leaving in one week to go back home to Costa Rica, but I trust that God is going to provide for me in other ways. I will be the only young single women here in Detroit, yet I trust that God is going to provide other friends and relationships for me to be supported and loved. I know that my brothers and the families are going to make an extra effort to care for me. God has provided for me so much these last 2.5 months, why would He stop? I am in the middle of a huge transition between Ana leaving, Priscilla breaking her foot, leading the youth group on my own, ect but I have so much peace and joy. Sometimes I can get scared of what is going to happen when Ana leaves, but I know that fear is only Satan's way of trying to get me to quit trusting God and falling into despair. I can't do that though because I have too much hope and trust in God. I am in the middle of God's will and I know He will provide for me. For all those who are reading this, I just hope and pray that you too old onto the hope of Christ when you are going through a transitions and trust that He will bring you through.
